Every single time that I've cut my hair (I moonlight as my own barber) for the past 3 years, I intently check to see if I am going bald. It's like a pregnancy test for my hair...if my hair falling out is like being with child. I also do some other hair growth checks for the ears and nose. So far my hair is not pregnant, nor have I developed an insulation/filter process for my auditory and olfactory systems. Even though I haven't seen any major changes I still check with certainty that this will be the moment I knew my life would change. There is a high probability that those with access to photos of me years ago may see a smidgeon of change on the battle line between forehead and hairline, but really nothing big. For full disclosure purposes, my arm hair has gotten longer and started to slide down my wrists toward the first knuckle of my pinkies, but that is more of a statement of pride than anything else.
It may sound like I am fearful of my physical appearance changing, but you would be incorrect. I would not choose to be bald; but I long ago lured a beautiful and intelligent young woman to put a ring on her finger and change her last name to Powell. So she's now stuck with whatever may become of my dome and I'm happy as long as she's around to admire it. The reality is that none of us know what is written on every page of our life. We don't really know what we will look like, what job we'll have, or who we'll date, who we'll marry, if we'll have kids or how many kids we'll end up with, or even the friends that we'll have. There are so many unknowns in life it can become overwhelming at times. Even if we know what we want, we might not know when or if that will ever be a part of our story.
At one point in my life I was convinced I would end up in the NBA; and I'd like to take this opportunity to let you all know I'm planning on entering the draft next year. That second part is not true. I did want to be a professional basketball player though. I thought that if I wanted it bad enough and if I practiced hard enough I could force it to happen for myself. The problem is I was not blessed with a supernatural ability to overcome the additional 6 inches I would need to compete at a top college, let alone in the NBA. If I had that ability and physique I would not have ended up going to the Bible college I went to, nor would I have met the love of my life, and I certainly would not have ended up volunteering at a church while working at an electrical wholesale warehouse. My life might not sound like the: "I've made it and so can you!" story; but when I take a deep breath and clear my thoughts I can tell you I wouldn't want to be anywhere else, doing anything else, with anyone else. I am blessed to have my story and would fight off anyone who would try to take it!
The point of this post is not to instill fear with the "what-ifs" or misguided hopes of "Imma-be's" (street lingo for: I'm going to be...why? cause that's how I roll), but rather to recognize the amount of hair I still have on my head and get to enjoy for one more haircut. Tomorrow is on it's way and it could change everything. We usually only have minimal control of our lives at any given moment. What are you doing with the little control you do have? Don't try to turn today into yesterday or tomorrow, that never works out.
I'm trying to figure out a strong finish for this post, but regardless of how hard I try the cliches seem to be black holes right at the moment pulling me ever-so-close. For fear of saying something like: "Live for today!" or "Carpe diem!" I will simply leave you knowing I'm very happy with my current hairline...and will be tomorrow too, regardless if it changes.
